Living the Life of My Dreams

Time to throw open the curtains and let the sunshine in. I’m sure that with my recent spate of rather dreary posts, that people probably think that I’m wandering around the house, wearing all black, cursing at my animals and dragging my left foot and clutching the walls like an unsteady hunchback. Not all of these things are untrue of course, but while doing my best Igor impression, I’ve taken stock of my life.  And I’m pretty happy with where it is going.

So, instead of making New Year’s resolutions, I thought about how my life would look if I lived without fear, if I gave up worrying, if I really went for my dreams. How would I spend my time if I spent my time the way *I* want to? What I came up with was this:    

I’d prepare fabulous brunches for myself. I’d become a full-time yogi.  I’d spend my mornings writing, my afternoons taking long walks, and my evenings doing things I loved. And more writing. I’d send more letters and greeting cards. There would be more little notes slipped in lunches and ordinary dinners with candles.

I’d sew my my own clothes. I’d volunteer with children. I’d travel around giving readings from my books. I’d go on month long retreats. I’d visit islands and mountains. I’d take fabulous photographs and hang them on my walls.

I’d become known for my literary salons. I’d have off-beat parties with formal invitations and tons of appetizers. I’d be a weight-loss guru and a cheerleader for more fabulous women. I’d give amazingly well-wrapped presents.

I’d dress eccentric & off-beat. I’d laugh more. I’d turn the music up all the way, and dance around my living room more often. I’d wear lip gloss everyday and finally get treatment for my rosacea. I’d go out dancing. I’d sleep in. I’d make an art out of afternoon siestas. I’d spend more time in the hammock.

I’d prepare lovely, fresh foods straight from my gardens. I’d make my own jam. I’d learn how to knit. I’d finish the quilt for my bed. I’d make wonderful Tom Kha soup. I’d finally learn how to cook a great steak. I’d write a cookbook just for fun. I’d slow dance on the beach. I’d erase the word can’t from my vocabulary.

So what would you do if you didn’t have to worry? How close are you to living the life of your dreams? How are you spending your energy?

I realized how close I am to this life now, and how I could be even closer just by spending my time in more meaningful ways. Pretty awesome. No lotteries to win. No tall dark dashing men to meet. Just the simple power of intention and I could be there. How about you?

Comments

[Johnnie Walker]

Happy New Year! :)

I just stopped by to shamelessly ask for your vote for the BoB award I've been nominated for. Make sure to cast your vote for Nite Owl. Thanks! :)

http://www.blogmechanics.com/bob/vote.php?pollID=20

[By the way, I found you on the list of folks who have "blogmarked" me on BE.]

[Garrison Steelle]

Ah, if I didn't have to worry, there'd be much, much more travel involved. More places. More pictures.

-G

[tanya]

First of all, great entry! And I don't think you have been sounding gloomy/dreary/dark or anything like that. I think you're normal, like me, and we all have our stress times and those moments when what we write comes more out of our fears and frustrations than the lighter moments of our lives.

I really do love my life, and I worry sometimes that that doesn't come across in my blog writing.

I loved your vision of what your life would be like if you did all the things YOU wanted.

"I thought about how my life would look if I lived without fear, if I gave up worrying, if I really went for my dreams. How would I spend my time if I spent my time the way *I* want to?"

I try to live without fear and I try to remember that worrying is a useless activity that only wastes my brain space. A lot of what I worry about is not about MYSELF, but about people I love. I have a long habit of worrying about my loved one's health problems.

Overall, I think I do a fairly good job of spending my life the way I want. I could go a bit deeper, though. I'd write full-time and only work part-time. I'd take more trips, particularly to NYC, the Mountains, the Oceans, and Disney World (that's an incongruous list, isn't it?).

I'd smile more than I already do. I already read a lot and I already found the man I want to love forever. I'd get a dog and spend time playing with the pet. I'd have a baby. I'd get up earlier to watch the sunrise.

And I'd continue to enjoy and do the amazing things I'm already doing. All in all, I think I'm on the right track; bit by bit, though, I can get more of the things I want incorporated into my life.

[Sweetlin]

I'd spend less time in this world and more time in the studio.
Feeling that energy come through my head and out my arm is just astounding. ...and what it reveals cannot be hidden.

And I've decided being grounded isn't all it's cracked up to be. I'd float just above the ground. Not so's it would be real noticeable, just enough to make landing from time to time light and sweet. ...the way I used to take my coffee.

And I'd have pets again, 'cause there's nothin' like the unconditional love of a dog when you come in the door from a long day out.

And I'd find all the outlets I could possibly find to express my love ...of everything. And I wouldn't care that people think I'm nuts or eccentric. I'm not rich enough to be eccentric, but I wouldn't mind trying it on for size. I think I'd be good at it.
And I'd build something really big. I mean like a research center, or a University. Not just donate a library. I'd build the whole thing from the ground up. I've spent enough time in 'em to know want I'd want in one of my own.

And somehow, I'd figure out a way for people to find all this for themselves, ...'cause it's been a long haul for me, and I think maybe it didn't have to be.

[Natalie]

wow...that post was amazing...and it got me thinking about what i really TRULY want in life.
~~wow~~
...and it also made me realize what I already have.
thanks for writing that--I needed it.

[Very Mom]

If I didn't have to worry? I don't think I can wrap my head around life without worry.

Just de-lurking, you know, in honor of de-lurking day.

[wavybrains]

Wow--Tanya--your list made me realize once again how close I am to living my dreams. I have the *best* dog in the world. I work part-time, and *in theory* can write full-time (this does not always happen) but it CAN! I am a champ at taking siestas, and I make wonderful dinners :) Oh and I *actually* *finally* got back to work on my book yesterday.

Sweetlin--I think I too would express my love of everything more. Worry sometimes holds me back from doing that. Or makes me sound like a harpie when I mean to sound loving.

Everyone is indeed so blessed---everyday!

Oh and happy de-lurking day! I better go de-lurk at all my usual haunts . . .

[Lanore]

Just discovered this blog tonight. I'm amazed at how similar you and your freak sound to me and my freak. We've been married 25 years--so much more to learn about each other. I think I'm closer to living the life of my dreams than my freak is to living his dreams. I feel rather guilty about that. Wish I could make it better for him--but I know it's each individual's inside job...easy for me to say, when things are so good for me. Anyway...it is good to find like minds. I'll be back.

Lanore